The reality of motor vehicle accidents....

A Split Second Can Change Everything

A POST FROM 2013

The high school where my son Alex attends did a mock accident this past week.

Have you ever been to one?

Wow. It was tough to watch.

I was not even going to go to the reenactment until Alex said he was okay with it. I was the one who was afraid of how difficult it would be to see.

I have been through a lot with Alex, but I am usually hands-on in the situation. On November 14, 2004, though, I was not actually at the scene. I did not have to see my little guy strapped to a stretcher, with his head and neck immobilized, a tube down his throat, and a stranger squeezing a bag to breathe for my son.

On that day, I was thrust into a new reality I had never experienced before, but I was spared from seeing the actual accident scene. I have always been thankful for that.

I knew seeing even a “fake” scene would be challenging, but I was not prepared for how difficult it would actually be.

This past week, when I saw the cars, watched the teams of first responders, and heard the helicopter, my heart not only beat faster — it hurt deeper.

I cannot fully express how difficult it was. It was difficult for many of the students who were there too. But that is the intention of a mock accident. It is meant to seem real and to portray as much of the reality of an actual accident as possible.

I was asked if I wanted to say something, and I did.

So I went from hesitating to go at all to standing up and speaking.

One reason I spoke was because I knew the impact it could have on some of those young lives. Another reason was that many of the students did not know Alex had been injured in a car accident. They thought he had been born paralyzed.

They know differently now.

Many of them came up to me afterward. One young girl had been a fellow six-year-old on the morning of the accident that injured Alex. She had been bouncing around with Alex just a few short hours before hearing that the helicopter was for her buddy.

After the mock accident, she was bawling.

All the feelings she had experienced eight and a half years earlier had resurfaced, and it hurt.

Mock accidents are set up to show as much of the reality of an accident as they can. 

It shows how many people it takes to help at the scene. Then think about all the other people who may become involved after an accident — doctors, nurses, respiratory therapists, surgeons, funeral home staff, physical therapists, rehabilitation teams, family members, friends, classmates, churches, neighbors, and so many others.

A split-second decision can suddenly thrust multiple people into a position no one would ever want to be in.

When the accident involving my son and my husband at the time happened, I was at home with my three younger children. They were four years old, two years old, and three days old.

I had been on the phone with my husband at the time. He was telling me that he and Alex had stayed after church to talk to some people and were then driving through the area. Suddenly, the phone went dead.

I tried to call him back, but he did not answer.

A few moments later, as I was changing my newborn’s diaper, the phone rang. I could not get to it in time, so I checked the caller ID as soon as I could.

It said, “Sheriff’s Department.”

I thought that was strange, but I did not have much time to think about it. Moments later, the phone rang again. This time, it was my husband at the time. He told me that he and our son had been in a serious accident and that our son might not be alive.

No one wants to receive that kind of phone call.

Nothing can prepare you for it.

I could write a lot more about that day, but in this post, I really want to talk about the reality of accidents.

They are called accidents, and sometimes things truly do just happen — like a deer jumping out in front of a vehicle. But many times, an accident is the result of a decision someone made. That decision may last only a second, but the consequences can last a lifetime.

Please think before you get into a vehicle.

I told the students at school that if they are on the road and someone tries to cut them off, let them go. Do not battle for position. Do not mess around on the road.

If you get into a vehicle, remember that if you are in an accident, you will not be the only person affected.

Do not text while driving. Please do not try to put on makeup, look at your phone, show off, race, or do anything that takes your attention away from the road.

Please focus on driving and on the people around you.

Because this is what can happen.

Accidents can result in death, which is final here on earth. They can also result in minor injuries, no injuries, or everything in between.

My son Alex is a reminder of the in-between.

He faces challenges each and every day, and so do those who love him dearly.

Later that summer, one of the students who had participated in the mock accident died in a real accident. That loss made the message even more painful and even more real. These warnings are not just school assemblies or dramatic reenactments. They are reminders that choices on the road can have consequences no one can undo.

This post is serious for a reason.

Please think.

This is a picture taken from Google Images of the car accident where Alex was a passenger in the back seat.

He woke up that morning a healthy, energetic six-year-old boy. A few short hours later, he had to be rescued from the car he had climbed into, never imagining that his next memories would be of waking up in a hospital, not knowing anyone there, unable to breathe on his own, and unable to move.

Please think. ⸻ This is a picture taken from Google Images of the car accident where Alex was a passenger in the b

He woke up that morning a healthy, energetic six-year-old boy. A few short hours later, he had to be rescued from the car he had climbed into, never imagining that his next memories would be of waking up in a hospital, not knowing anyone there, unable to breathe on his own, and unable to move. ⸻

 

This is a picture of Alex around Christmas of 2004. A dear nurse dared to be brave enough to get him dressed and up in his chair. I cannot even describe how difficult it was to walk into his hospital room for the first time and see a wheelchair, knowing it was for my son. Wow. Alex was still in a coma in this picture. Even though he would open his eyes, his brain was not yet able to process what it was taking in.